I recently found that a group that has been a been a big part of my life is going to disband. Nothing is certain, but the safe bet is that this particular area of my life is going to change. I see it as a good thing coming to an end, but it also is a great example of looking for a silver lining in a dark cloud.
Momentum Can Make Change Hard
Nature applies to so many areas of our lives and momentum is one of these. The idea that an object in motion stays in motion (or one at rest stays at rest) seems universal. We prefer to keep on doing what we have done whether a change is likely to be an improvement or not. This occurs throughout our lives. Look at the fear and trepidation that occurs when children go off to grade school, start high school, leave for college, etc. Heck, we see tears at weddings. It is sometimes due to joy, but often the tears are for a chapter that is being firmly closed.
Change is Progress
Although I am not one to bring up the wise sayings of my father, one saying still sticks with me. He said that a sad part of life is that part of our success is measured by those we leave behind. That is far deeper than he usually was, but it is proof that everyone has their moments (just kidding).
The idea of change being leaving things behind (which we all seem to get) so we can experience new things is one that can help keep us positive. In my case, it stinks that the group will be left behind, but that opens possibilities for new groups to form. This is how we all grow. You can’t add a son-in-law to the family without letting go of your daughter. You can’t have a family without giving up the single life. Change is how we move through life so why not embrace it as we do our next breath?
Left Behind is Not Forgotten
We are all shaped by our past. We have “baggage” that forms as soon as we engage in life. Change may force us to leave things behind but that doesn’t mean they are forgotten. Life leaves its mark whether it is a good memory of a loved one or a painful one we prefer to forget. So there is no shame or disrespect involved in moving forward. We take those we can with us, but sometimes our paths go in different directions.
It is a new year and your life will be different. Last year may have been good or bad, but the coming year can be the best ever. Do not worry about what the future may bring. Instead, look for the opportunities to move forward and be a better version of you. It may not be easy. Luckily, you have no choice. Change is relentless like that.
As for me, I’ll use the lessons learned and friendships created as a launchpad for the next chapter of that part of my life. May you do the same and build on your past rather than allow it to weigh you down.